Now that I’ve become more active on social media I’ve noticed a few things. Something that has been weighing on my heart, something I don’t think no matter WHAT “status” I want to achieve, I would NOT sacrifice my character for
Such as the term:
Don’t get me wrong, I love staying in contact with long-distance relatives, collaborating with other influencers, meeting new people that share the same “likes’ (get the pun! haha! 😜) and USING MY “influence” IN THE RIGHT MANNER.
I have grown a new passion that is fun, and that I can utilize as an easy channel to spread my blog and boutique in an interactive way and connect with so many! That is pretty cool!
You discover ways that you really realize you’re NOT alone in the way you feel sometimes, what you are going through, what you’ve experienced, and how you can utilize this medium to share some of the topics you can talk about to help others relate. You can share cool gifts, ideas, fashions, beauty secrets, recipes, the list is and has been endless for me…and FUN!
I’ve been really enjoying it.
What I don’t get is the “follow you, so you follow me” thing or the constant liking or commenting when it doesn’t really make sense. Or those that will spend HOURS on social media liking everything from everyone JUST for another “LIKE” or “FOLLOWER”. I Just don’t get it. Nor do I think it’s healthy.
So part of my day job besides the property management/ real estate brokerage investment firm is my family has a global manufacturing business. It’s a pretty big deal. It’s pretty cool to walk into a store and say, “Oh, we made that!” To browse on PRIME and say oh “That’s ours!” or “OMG, That was my husband’s Idea!” It’s just pretty cool. It’s a team effort and gosh SO MANY have worked SO hard for many, many years to accomplish this. Allot of blood, sweat, and tears. But the COOLEST part about this is how we’ve grown over time and the many tools I now have at my fingertips.
Like Marketing: We used to have one marketing guy, now we have a division and it’s pretty darn cool. So the first thing I did when I started noticing these CRAZY patterns is asking these guys who run our marketing division, who specialize in this field, who actually went to SCHOOL for JUST social media, is ask “WTH“?
WHY do people do this? They explained the science behind “ALGORITHM” and the Psychology of “THE Instagram user” etc.. etc… It was a whole System, a Science, yadda, yadda, yadda… they explained.
Ok. I’m not going to lie, they lost me at “ALGORITHM.”
Call me old school. But I just don’t get it. I’M NOT going to waste hours of my productive day, liking just to get a like. Following just to get a follow. Am I the only one that thinks this is NUTS? Yes, now I know I’m no genius, I’m no expert, I didn’t go to school for specialized marketing, and I’m no psychologist by far!
BUT … it DOESN’T TAKE A DEGREE to understand the NEGATIVE aspects of behavior like this can result in! Hello??!! I CAN’T be the only one who thinks this, I can’t be…surely.
Maybe that’s why I’M not at THAT kind of ‘Influencer” status. I don’t play these GAMES. I don’t want to be if it takes THIS!
I want my “FRIENDS”/My MOM QUEENS to have something in COMMON with me. To have mutual respect. To be able to LEARN from another, to have things in common, to be inspired by another, there’s SO MUCH I envision on BOTH ends.
But what I won’t do, is PLAY GAMES. I graduated high school a LONG time ago and it was painful. So I’m ok in the mental game fields.
I want to Follow REAL influencers! If you notice people that are REAL Successful in REAL LIFE not just in social media, they STILL would be WITHOUT Social Media! They don’t play games. Their status isn’t taken by followers, it’s in the bank or in real estate, it’s in their real LIFE STYLE not an image, it’s in the birth of their company or a product or service they slaved to create and make successful. Successful people don’t have time for games.
Heck, everyday moms are SUCCESSFUL EVERYDAY so we shouldn’t have time for games either.
For instance, I recently had a follower last week from the SPARKLE world start to follow me. Duh, I get a notification. This person talked SO much untrue TRASH on a different level and involved my family. Am I going to “Follow back” just to have “A Friend”? Heck NO!
GAMES. I don’t do games. I do honesty, Integrity, especially when you push me. The Sparkle world is a very small world so you can imagine the millions of screen shots I’ve got as proof of this that I never even wanted to be sent to me. I don’t do this.
Now, I’m also a VERY forgiving person, I’ve forgiven for a lot in my life, far worse as I’ve said. An apology goes a LONG way with me. One apology and I’m done. Well, Probably my not my hubby that poor guy has to probably live out me bringing back up those mistakes here and there, that’s what women do sometimes, right? lol.
But I’m also a very easy person to understand, I wear my feelings on my shoulders, and I can face the tough and give it when necessary, and I handle things with integrity and class. I don’t make a scene, I let time show true colors. I simply walk away or make my distance, so if I’ve cut someone off more than likely they handed me the scissors…. probably more than once!
So this game, follow you to follow me… when does your integrity step in? Being on social media I notice these things more, makes me also think less of the FRIEND that’s friends with everyone. That kind of friend doesn’t show much loyalty or integrity.
My friends are those that I can message, those that I can call, those that SHARE an interest, those that “LIKE” what I do (get it, pun again! Haha I’m on a roll watch out!) Friends that I’m inspired by, You get what I mean. Not the social media friend that can increase my “ALGORITHM.”
So I just don’t get this Crazy pattern, this FRONT. Why?
I wouldn’t want to “INFLUENCE” if it wasn’t by genuinely influencing. Not just some picture, or just give a like when I really don’t mean it, just so they’ll like my stuff in return. Seriously?
I follow people who I think are great influencers, my FRIENDS are those I’m inspired by. Not for a number. Not for a status.
My status is calling a girlfriend last minute and she meets me at the nail salon last night. Running into an old neighbor friend at the seamstress. An old SPARKLE sister friend calling me about re-entering the Sparkle World and what advice I could give her, connecting with an influencer that has a podcast that I realize we have so much in common I want to know more about her, a mom from the east coast Being touched by my post on the Mom Serenity Prayer that needed to hear it that moment I did, because she can relate. These are friends I want to be inspired by, grow with, influence them as the influence me.
I wouldn’t want a MILLION friends If it meant shedding my character.
Hasn’t anyone seen Ralf Breaks The Internet? I took my kids to see this and there’s a pivotal point in that movie that even my kids understood! That’s the negative side effects of those out there searching for LIKES and Searching for FRIENDS “hearts” as they put it. Spending hours on social media is NOT healthy, it takes ONE public critique by some anonymous stranger across the world to CRUSH your million likes if you follow this “average psychology of the Instagram user” ways!
So tonight, I encourage my FRIENDS to up your Insta-Game by increasing your standards. It says a lot to the people that REALLY follow you and that aren’t trying to just be nice. Or play The Game!
CONNECT with your friends outside of social media, get involved in a community or organization, a mom group, a prayer group, a business outside where if ALL the social media crashed… you could still pay your bills! Use it for the good, don’t contribute to the bad.
Go through your feed FRIENDS and clean it out! LET YOUR FEED, FEED YOUR SPIRIT Mom Queens and I just hope I’m one. Take the time to work on yourselves not your status!
Happy Hump Day Mom Queens!