One of the hardest challenges in the SPARKLE world of pageantry is being mentally tough enough to stay head strong, aware, and confidently consistent through out the competition.
This is an important aspect to the SPARKLE girl because mental strength and confidence can really make you or break you before, during, and after the competition.
THIS is a topic I want to address because I’ve seen it SO many times when girls check themselves out the minute they arrive at orientation and start seeing all the other contestants. Or worse, with social media, when they start contestant “groups” or when some girls actually seek out their fellow contestants! Hellloooo girls!! If you can weed out through the mental head games of all this, you’ll still find out that the negatives outweigh the positives here! DON’T let your mind check you out of the competition before the pageant has even begun, this is exactly what this aids in. Check out girls, DO YOU. Stay strong, mind over matter!
We’ve all been there before, we’ve prepared hard for months and spent all our extra time and money preparing for a goal that means so much to us, and another. So all the feels we get: the anxiety, the butterflies, and the nerves when we arrive at orientation is normal! We – ALL– get- them! Period. The only way you wouldn’t is if you didn’t give a hoot, didn’t prepare at all, or spend an ounce of your heart caring to be there, and we all do so we all feel them.
Once you’re there you start meeting all these amazing girls and women and you start second-guessing what makes you WORTHY? Then you start thinking of all her great attributes and start losing sight of all YOURS!
This is normal, we all do, but over time I’ve learned some great tips on how to overcome this mental challenge that I wanted to share. Heck, after competing against several hundred girls as an insecure TEEN in my USA days and not having an ounce of knowledge of what I was doing or any belief that I deserved just as much as they did to be there, I sure have changed this mental state in my 23 years of competing.
From a Miss to Now a MRS taking on one of the MOST challenging states to compete in over 5 times, where the numbers are large, the competition is successful, and contestants are strong, I sure did change and I used these tactics to do so!
Not just when being the lucky blessed one with over 50 Mrs on a STATE stage, that’s nothing compares to the intimidation of a NATIONAL stage and competition!For you girls that haven’t been to nationals there’s no head games like national head games! The lack of sleep, long days, 12 hours on your feet, no private time, and being away from your families can really add to your metal stress. That’s when the going gets tough girls!
So if your headed to a national stage or even back to your states, take it from a girl that has been to a national stage over four times and has landed in the top 3 of those big 3 pageants, I wouldn’t or couldn’t have done so WITHOUT being mentally strong and prepared!
I could’ve worked out until I was blue in the face, had the best fashion designer create my gown, have the greatest coaches and make up artist known to man, BUT if I wasn’t mentally strong to get TO AND THROUGH competition, all of my hard work or effort would be wasted! Period.
Here are a few tips on how to stay mentally strong walking INTO orientation and walking out of the pageant… just the SPARKLY same!
Being 110% fully prepared to the best of your ability will help you NOT second guess your decisions throughout competition! Being prepared and organized also helps your mind stay focused.
KNOW YOUR AREAS OF STRENGTHS:
Let’s face it we all have our own strengths and weaknesses, even during pageant competition. Take the time to know and accept yours and play off your strengths. Find ways to highlight your strengths so you are remembered for those!
For instance, one of my strengths would be stage presence and height when it comes to onstage. When it comes to interviewing, the heart I put in my platform work would be one of my areas of strength.
There are was I can accentuate these strengths in competition. For example, I can steer the interview around my platform work and experience by the way I answer my questions and on stage, I can take extra time and different poses to make my stage presence known and accentuate my height. It’s all planned and prepared girls! You put in those extra fine details and plan them, those things help you stand out amongst your Sparkle peers.
I’m writing this blog actually because just last night a Sparkle Sister of mine that I had the privilege of judging once and seeing her compete and grow tremendously the following year reached out to me for just some small tips.
Off course I don’t mind, she specifically asked for tips on how to stay mentally strong throughout competition week, she explained that was her weakness. She losses herself when she starts to see all of her sister’s Sparkle in front of her and it begins to weigh her down.
I gave her these tips and because I know her and have watched her grow, I gave her some strengths that’s I’ve noticed in her and some small tips on where and when throughout the competition that she can highlight her amazing strengths! Small little things that she can use to her advantage to make those strengths stand out from the crowd.
For instance communication and her resume is her strongest attribute! It’s pretty dang impressive her resume, there are ways she can steer every question around that strength AND because of her communication strength, her delivery with on stage questions should be her slam dunk! Sometimes it’s not what you say but HOW you say it, this should be her added Sparkle!
So what are your SPARKLE strengths? Think about them, know them! Once you do, DO this very important next tip!
TAKE INVENTORY & CONSTANT MENTAL ROLL CALL:
Once you know your areas of strength during competition take inventory of them! Write them down! Also, write down or make a mental list of ALL those amazing things that makes YOU just as worthy of being that one under the crown just as any other Sparkle Sister! Your just as deserving, take this mental list to KNOW that yourself!
Take that list of strengths and your list of deserving characteristics that YOU possess and CONSTANTLY remind yourself every day, in every aspect of competition, and repeat them to yourself! Take a mental roll call as much as you need! The minute you start seeing all those amazing things in the girl next to you and it starts having you lose sight of your own SPARKLE! Notice it! Shut it down and take your roll call sister, remind yourself WHY YOU SPARKLE!
The last thing is a tough one especially when you work so hard to prepare…
BE OK WALKING AWAY WITHOUT THE CROWN:
This is tough, but realize that IT NEEDS YOU! YOU DO NOT NEED IT!
You do not need a crown or a title to do amazing things in your life and with or without it the sun will still rise and set. Do not make it the center of your every day of preparation because when you do you start losing yourself in the thought of you NEEDING it!
There’s a special SPARKLE in a contestant’s confidence when she truly believes that she doesn’t NEED it. When she knows IT’S better off having HER, then SHE having IT!
What she can do for the crown, not what the crown can do for her! Truth is it can’t do anything, only she can. When you realize this it also makes you mentally strong and helps you not obsess over the fact of winning. It helps you be present during competition and clear.
Some of these tips are tough and come over time. Be patient sister! Work on them and they will come. I hope some of these small tips can help you walk OUT of your next orientation just as mentally strong and confidently aware as you walked IN!
I hope these tips will help you SPARKLE just a little brighter! 💖
Happy Thursday Mom Queens!