I previously did a blog about taming our inner Maleficent. That we all have this inner evil princess in our heads that tries to belittle our self worth every moment. You know that voice in our head telling us we aren’t this or that, and always the first to point out our flaws! That voice! Our inner Maleficent, the evil princess voice! We all have one of her in our head. All of us.
This past weekend was a prime example of that! My Mom Queen Boutique had a Ladies Fun Day Sunday where I invited local girls in the area to come sip, shop, and try on all the boutique’s items and clothes to see how they fit, check out their quality, and have some girl fun.
Well, as I sipped wine with all the girls helping them shop I noticed ONE thing EVERY girl did when trying on clothes! It didn’t matter if they were small, tall, long, big, curvy, petite, or purple for that matter! EVERY girl, no matter their size pointed out their flaws IMMEDIATELY when looking in the mirror at herself in a cute new piece!
EVERY! GIRL! Every single one! Some who you just wanted to smack in the head and wonder who she sees in the mirror because it’s not the same as we see.
“My butts to big”, “Does this make me look like I have back fat?”, “My boob aren’t big enough”, “This makes me look fat”, “You can see my baby pooch”, “I’m too short for this” OH- MY- GOSH! The self-critique list was endless!
Today I went to the doctor, well you know what that means… they weigh you in at check in! Yep! Argghhh. Gosh, I really wish they didn’t have to do that! They should invent something that as you walk in weighs you so it’s not so noticeable Or such a “number” because that number has been on my mind since. Every time I walk by a mirror today, I now can NOT shut that evil princess in my mind UP! I do the same as every one of my friends when they look in the Mirror… I point out my flaws!
We all do! We are all our own worst critics! We as women are incredibly hard on ourselves! Why?
I wish I wasn’t, I wish none of us were. But it is a fact, no matter how hard we work on our appearance, health or even career we still can find and point out the negative.
Yesterday I did a SPARKLE blog about passing blame when we lose or fail instead of taking a moment to heal, and then reflect how we can grow. I’ve had great feedback on how so many SPARKLE girls can relate to this blog. So many girls commented about how hard they were on themselves and that they had such high expectations for themselves that it completely made them go bonkers competition week because of the stress they put on themselves! See in every aspect we all do this to ourselves. Every aspect even our careers, even parenting.
So as I was complaining to my husband the whole drive home how I’m officially 20lbs heavier than I was when I would compete, Yes you heard me right 20! I found myself focusing on that every minute since! All day I haven’t been by a mirror and or looked at my legs squished pressed again my driver seat thinking OMG MELISSA and non-stop tearing myself apart since!
Yes, I do it too, we all do I know I’m not alone on this one. Sundays comments from every girl and the comments from my SPARKLE blog are proof! After today though personally it’s like a wrecking ball of negative thoughts from this evil chick in my brain! SO as I walked past my hall mirror to sit and write my blog and finishing work for the day. I almost did it again until I told that Witch to shush!
I’m happy! I look fine! I don’t FEEL 20 lbs at all… and I know my body is going through things so I told her to shut up! Then I thought of a new habit I’m going to try starting!
I’m starting a new habit today and I wanted to share since I know we all do this! Instead of looking at that girl in the mirror and pointing out her weakness, make it a point to point out her strengths! Every morning look at her and name 3 things you like about her! Quickly three things every day they can be the same or different. Throughout the day remind her of these things in your head as you walk by or look in any mirror! Even if you’re walking through target and see a mirror, or looking in the rearview at the car behind you, you see her, Remind her! All day! Then the next day think of 3 more and keep doing it, I’m going to keep doing it. Until I stop focusing on the negative first!
Join me! That girl we see in the mirror Mom Queens, make her day! Give her a compliment or 2 every day to start her day! Maybe then we’ll not be so hard on ourselves!
What’s your 3?
Today mine is:
1- Today’s Friday I get to work from home!
2- My butt looks good in these new yoga pants! ;)-
3- I love that I have brown eyes!
Simple. Done. Tomorrow they’ll be different. What’s yours? Feel free to share because I really hope you remind yourself of your good instead of the negative, at least I hope too!
Happy FRI-YAY Mom Queens!